Tuesday, December 9, 2008

5 Steps to Get Back at Your Ex

A relationship is a fragile thing that needs to be worked on all the time in order to keep things fresh and healthy. Although it's sad, breakups do happen and when they do, they can really wreak havoc in your life, sending you into an emotional tailspin.

If your ex recently broke up with you, you may be angry and obsessing on ways to get back at your ex, but nothing good comes from something like this. One of the smartest ways to get back at your ex (if that's how you want to think about it) is interestingly enough, a strategy that may eventually lead to you and your ex getting back together.

That said, here are 5 tips to get back at your ex which could ultimately result in fixing your relationship.

1. Be smart and strong. No one likes to be around someone who is needy and this is especially true of your ex after the breakup of your relationship. Don't beg, cling or call your ex five times a day or worse yet, after you have been drinking in the middle of the night. Getting back at your ex means playing it cool, making him or her believe that you are fine and ready to move on.

2. Cut down on communications on your end. Don't call your ex, but do take calls from him or her, but if you still want to get back at your ex, wait a day or two before you respond. Whether you want to get back at your ex or get your ex back in your life, this will allow your ex to have some time away from you, so they will eventually start missing you and focusing on the positive aspects of your relationship.

3. Be reasonable and flexible in dealing with your ex. For instance, if you were living together, don't threaten your ex that if he or she doesn't pick up their stuff by a certain date, you will trash it. Instead, of being vindictive or unreasonable in an attempt to get back at your ex, just put their stuff aside. The best way of getting back at your ex is to show that you are okay after your breakup.

If your ex does contact you, be a good listener and sympathize with what your ex is feeling. This will show your good side to your ex and your ex will be attracted to this and will remember the good aspects of your character, those aspects that they fell in love with and are beginning to miss. When getting back at your ex remember that the best revenge is success, so show your ex how resilient you are.

4. Go out and have fun. Hang out with your friends again. Seek the kindness and support of others to help you get through this difficult time. Take up a hobby. Do things that you couldn't do with your ex. You don't have to date if you don't feel like it, but getting out and having a good time, rather than hounding your ex or plotting ways to get back at your ex, will be good for you and could eventually result in getting back with your ex if this is what you want.

5. Enjoy being yourself and discovering who you are again on your own without someone else by your side. After all the person you truly are is the one your ex fell in love with. If you allow that person to come out again and work on your weaknesses, then the next time your ex sees you he or she will be wondering how they ever let you get away. This is the best way to get back at your ex: make your ex want you again!

Laura Ramirez (a.k.a. Laura Love) offers relationship advice, inspirational love quotes and romantic gift ideas on her web site. For a great plan to get back ex, check out her web site.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Laura_Ramirez

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